I hold to the experiential theory myself and I think it necessarily contradicts the identity view. I argue for a materialist and anticapitalist theory of the social experiential view here:https://medium.com/@alysonescalante/beyond-negativity-what-comes-after-gender-nihilism-bbd80a5fc05d (I linked to this in the article)

and I’ve worked to do think about the social experiential view in relation to trans issues here: https://medium.com/@alysonescalante/how-we-talk-about-trans-inclusion-matters-75e1c6fce5dc

I didn’t want to rehash either in this article because its already horrifically long at nearly 6000 words.